Sarasota Marathon Race Report: Warning, Very Boring!!!

I have finally recovered enough to tell the tale of my first ever marathon experience. In short, I enjoyed the race and am looking forward to more suffering in the near future, (see side bar of races to run). I finished the marathon in 4hrs. and 18 min. For anyone with no life what so ever, I invite you to read my full report below. If you happen to have problems sleeping this report may just be the cure you need.

Sunday Feb. 15, I awoke to begin my normal, or abnormal, race day rituals. First ritual, make sure upon awakening my feet hit the floor at a number that adds up to either a 3 or 9. I look at the clock, exactly 3:00 A.M. Check!!! Next, I consume a small meal which consists of 1 brownie cliff bar. Yum-Yum, Check!!! I then get dressed in some running attire and head out for a 10 minute easy pace run. This step serves two purposes. First it gets the body loosened up for the race and secondly, other bodily functions are loosened up at the same time. I noted during my warm up run that at this early hour it was already rather humid outside. Good writers would call my last sentence foreshadowing. Anywho... My next ritual is rather obvious. After dropping the kids off at the pool, I take a long warm shower. O.K. now I'm ready to go. One problem though, the race starts at 6:00 and it's only 4:30. Shit!!!

At 5:30 fellow runners begin to show up at the house. Since our house is only 1/8 of a mile from the start line of the race, my wife invited anyone we knew running a parking spot. Five people took her up on the offer. At 5:45 the excited crew was ready to head towards the starting line. One note, of all the things I enjoy about running in these races, probably the best is seeing all the energy and enthusiasm people seem to have before the start of a race. If there were only a way to bottle this energy and sell it. We finally made it to the start line, wished each other good luck and headed are separate ways. I found my way to the 9:00 min (4 hr. marathon) pace group. I settled in behind the pace leader, listened to final minute instructions and the singing of the national anthem. 6:00 A.M. The race begins, 2 thousand plus crazy runners head down Bayshore Road in the pitch black darkness. The cadence of the 4,000 feet is deafening.

Miles 1-6: The Honeymoon Stage:

The first six miles our pace group appears quite large,(probably 40 runners). The main reason is the first 5.5 miles the half and full travel along the same route. The larger group remains in good spirits during these miles, mostly due to the half marathon pacer. She tells her group every mile how they are doing great and most importantly are on pace. I mean there was no shutting this HO up!!! Regardless, these first few miles breezed by. I was already starting to feel the effects of the humidity. My shirt was soaked with sweat, (I know TMI).

Mile1: 9:21, Mile2: 8:52, Mile3: 9:16, Mile4: 8:51, Mile5: 8:51, Mile6: 8:59

Miles 7-12: No Longer Honeymoon, But Still Having Sex Stage:

The half marathoners have now left us, and the realization of running a full marathon has now set in. Our pace group of 40, is now a mere 9 lonely souls. The small group is now quiet and focused as we all work to conserve energy. Our pace leader has began pushing the pace a little during these miles while the rest of us try to adjust to the quicker speed. I am still feeling strong at this point, knowing that I ran this pace during most of my longer runs. The miles are still moving by quickly.

Mile7: 8:37, Mile8: 8:46, Mile9: 9:13, Mile10: 8:44, Mile11: 8:51, Mile12: 8:50

Miles 13-18: Married With Children:

Our pace group past the half way point of the marathon at 1hr. 55 min. That time is just 4 minutes over my fastest ever half marathon time. The humidity is starting to wear on me and the others in my group. The group becomes separated for the next few miles, but I just keep checking my watch and attempt to stay at the 9 minute pace. Finally, at mile 16 I noticed the pace leader and what is left of our group is right behind me. The pace group is now just three of us, obviously I'm not the only one that was being effected by the 90-100% humidity. My stomach is now starting to feel a little strange. I'm sure it was the early stages of dehydration. My brain was starting to listen to my body. The two of them had already conspired to stop at the 20 mile water stop to take in more than the two cups we were taking at each stop. At mile 18 the pace leader was just in front of me. I remember him calling to me, "Come on Jason, lets go". I had the endurance and will, but lacked the energy and was slowing down.

Mile13: 8:46, Mile14: 8:58, Mile15: 9:01, Mile16: 9:10, Mile17: 9:14, Mile18: 9:03

Miles 19-26.2: Who Is This Bitch with Children, And Why Are They All In My House?:

At mile 19 all I could do is continue to slow down and watch my pace leader, all by himself at this point, fade out of my view. I made it to the next rest stop, listened to my mind and body and stopped to drink more fluids. I reached mile 20 at my goal time of 3 hours. I tried to continue running, but my calves were now starting to cramp up. I decided to run as much as I could and walk through the remaining water stops. I now know what they mean by the saying "The Race Begins at Mile 20". Mile 20 was the longest I have ever run to this point and can see why most training has you go no further. The last six miles might as well been 100 miles. I hit the "Fucking Wall". I continued to force my way to the finish line. Every so often I would be passed, or pass a fellow runner that was struggling along to the end. At mile 25 I decided to suck it up and run to the finish. It had taken me an hour and eight minutes to travel the last 5 miles, the least I could do is push it the last one. I tried to remember back to all the training and miles I ran along these same streets, but the motivational shit wasn't working. The cheers from family and spectators at the end was uplifting though. I finally crossed the finish line and immediately swore I would never run a marathon again.

By Monday that had all Changed... Peace out!!!

Mile19: 9:27, Mile20: 12:54 Shit!!!, Mile21: 12:21 Double Shit!!!, Mile22: 11:19 O.K.
Mile23: 11:31, Mile24: 11:35 Consistent, Mile25: 12:46 Consistently Shitty That Is!!!
Mile26.2: 9:45 Strong Finish!!! 4hrs 18 min. 4651 Calories Burned!!!

Done!!!

4 hours 18 minutes!!! Race report later...

Finally!!! Sarasota Shows This Guy Some "LOVE"

This blog of mine must really be catching on. I went from hundreds of dedicated readers to a whole county of people that are now honoring my hard work. That's right, I served this area tirelessly for years on a city a board without as much as thank you. When I was finally replaced the powers to be never even contacted me to let me know that my seat had been filled. I actually had to call the city planning dept. and asked why I was no longer receiving my quarterly packet for board meetings. The nice lady said, "I thought you knew that your time limit for serving was up and we have replaced you". Funny!!! I served over ten years on this board that has term limits of eight years. So, after the first eight I made mention at every meeting for the next two years that my terms were up and if it was O.K. that I was still serving. Never an answer. So, imagine my dismay when I wasn't even given the courtesy of a phone call to let me know that I no longer needed to show up. However, all has know been forgiven.

The highly elected officials of Sarasota obviously read this blog and have been following my training. It seems that they have put together a small running event this weekend in my honor. I understand the name of the event as of now is, the "ABC 7 Sarasota Grouper Marathon". From what I hear "The Thank You Jason Bennett for Over a Decade of Service Marathon" had lots of support, but was shot down at the last minute due some legal issues with another race in a small town in Kashikstan with a similar sounding name. The name recognition means little to me Sarasota. Just knowing that you all care and are proud of my accomplishments is enough for me. Let me just say from the bottom of my heart, I accept this honor bestowed upon me and will run "MY" event with pride knowing that this town is filled with such love.

Upon crossing the finish line I want all "MY" fellow runners to know that they are indeed lucky to run with such greatness, no matter how much slower you run than yours truly. To the ones that may finish ahead of me in Sunday's race, it's only because I got a cramp, stomach ache, stopped to pee, or your just faster. Don't be surprised if you happen to disqualified. "MY" race can have only one true winner and during "MY" victory speech I will praise all who decided to join "MY" run. A fellow runner once said, " In running, it doesn't matter whether you come in first, in the middle of the pack, or last. You can say 'I have finished.' There is a lot of satisfaction in that." I figured this may give all you loser's and middle of the packers some kind of inspiration.

Let me say in closing that I take great pride in what Sarasota is doing for me. I mean, "MY" own freaking race, "Holy Shit". Let me leave you with one more quote. "You cannot propel yourself forward by patting yourself on the back." I have no idea what that quote means, but somehow I know I'm awesome for ending with it. Peace Out!!!

Thursday: 3 miles Friday: 3 miles Sunday: Marathon in "MY" honor.

Did I ever tell you about the time I woke up in the morning to get the newspaper and a Black Cat crossed my path?

I don't make this shit up!!! Yesterday I woke up as usual, making sure my feet hit the floor at exactly 5:31 in the A.M., and headed out to retrieve the newspaper. As I headed down the driveway the cat in question made eye contact, and like all cats gave me that "GO Fuck Yourself Buddy" look. Cats seem to do this particular look almost as well as the human females in my life. I continued on my path towards the newspaper hoping the cat would get up from its sleeping position and run off the driveway without crossing in front of me. Ahhh Sorry, No Such Luck!!! That little bastard slowly rose up and purposefully walked directly across my path. I picked up the newspaper, swore at the cat and started to head back towards the house. Something made me turn back one last time to look at the evil cat. The cat gave me a look that I won't soon forget. If I was a superstitious type, I would have to believe that all my training for my upcoming race was for not and I am doomed to fail.

Good thing I'm not superstitious!!!

I went back inside and got dressed for my 5 mile morning run. During the run I was extra cautious of the roads and sidewalks along my route. Damn Cat!!! It's funny how the week before each race, I become more careful than I've been compared to the previous weeks of training. It's also interesting how I can now feel every little sore muscle and ache. It's all in the brain. The body is finally starting to convince the brain that it needs a rest and is not ready for the task at hand. Good try body, (you too, fucking black cat), this mind is mentally prepared for this test, you're just along for the ride. Peace Out!!!

Tuesday: 5 miles 46 minutes

6 miles to go until race day!!!

Open Letter To: Anyone That Happens to be Reading This!!!

Dear Anyone That Happens to be Reading This,

First off hello my name is Jason and I'm grammatically challenged. Seriously, I would be shocked if grammatically was even a word in the dictionary. If you are reading this you probably know that I mainly write about running and my observations on running, or maybe you just happened to come across this blog hoping I was a famous athlete that was giving a look into his or her personal life. Sorry to disappoint. The closest I ever came to athletic stardom is being blown out in a state championship football game in high school. Oh yeah, a couple of years and about 60 pounds ago I was mistaken for a All Pro linemen that plays for the Chicago Bears. So much for my fifteen minutes of fame.

I know that my beautiful wife occasionally reads this blog. Shout out to you Alisa!!! Hopefully you get back to your Face Book and away from your recent gambling addiction. Seriously, I think Kenny Rodgers said it best, " You go to know when to hold them...know when to fold them...and most important when to walk away".
I kid, because I love. I also recently noticed I have a follower on my blog page, which was very shocking to me. Especially when I found out it was my extremely intelligent cousin. I thinking she reads this occasionally to see that America is really becoming dumbed down. And what better place to see it happening than on this blog. I'm sure there are others, I hear rumours. To you silent Blog Stalkers, I'm glad you're here. I mean why waste time reading a interesting book or magazine when you can read this garbage.

Lastly, I promise to get back to writing about running because I know that's what my audience really wants. Actually it's what I want and need to write about at this point in my life. Besides my wife and two children, running is the only thing that keeps me sane. In an unfair business world of I'll rub your back and hopefully you'll return the favor, and where ridiculously low bidders just pick random numbers out of thin air. When running I'm in control and rewarded for my hard work no matter how low the number, or time. During these economic times I find that much more refreshing. Peace Out!!!

Virtual (D.O.A.) called while I was in Vegas Baby!!!

Well Elvis and January have left the building. Seriously, how fast did that month blow by? Yesterday was my wife and I last day in Vegas with several other wild and crazy couples. As a whole the group shared a lot of good times and bonded together, and what we gave money wise to the casinos I think we made up for in alcohol consumption.

I also got my last long run in yesterday. I don't think there is a better way to take in a city than lacing on some comfortable shoes and exploring the streets by foot. I ran the entire strip including the Historic Fremont Street area downtown and enjoyed all 3 hours of it. Somewhere on my way back from downtown I received a phone call from (D.O.A.) letting me know he was in Gainesville staying with a cheerleader at the University of Florida that he had recently met on Face book. I once again tried to explain the phone was only to be used to call me at the end of each month, but was distracted by the rather explicit photos he was sending to me of his new friend. I also found it rather ironic that he ended up in Gainesville since the majority of the other couples we were with on this trip are die hard Gator fans. I'm hopeful that (D.O.A.) will continue on his way when I begin running later in the week. But I wouldn't wager on it, however my wife most definitely would. Peace Out!!!

20 miles 3:19